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OPINION - Square Globe News - JUL, 2006

What’s This ?

This is Square Globe News, or “SG-News” by shorthand, or www.sg-news.com by internet.   We bring you news from the four directions.   So you think you know what “NEWS” means.   Well, you don’t.   “NEWS” is made up from the first letters of the four directions – North, East, West, South.

Ok, so it really isn’t a “square” globe.   But haven’t you ever heard the phrase “the four corners of the globe” ?   See – it really isn’t round after all.   It’s a rectangle.   If you chopped it in half vertically it would be two squares.   But then it would be the “Square Globes News”.   Ok, so it has some thickness, meaning that it can’t be a “square” or a “rectangle”, but instead it must be some kind of cube.   But then it would have eight corners and would technically be called the “Rectangular Prism News”.   But that sounds like an optical physics journal.   So just get with the program and quit whining.

I’m your host, the “Editor”.   You are the “reader”.   I rule here.   You rule there.   So that makes us even.   Except that “here” is a much bigger empire than “there”.   So that makes us not even.   That is why you must pay tribute to feed the mighty empire !

SG-News is oblivious to the so-called “real world”.   But I’m writing about it, and you’re reading it – so that makes us both naughty.   And if you’re reading this on company time, then you’re even naughtier than I expected.   But I’m also writing this while on duty, so I’m the naughtiest of all.

For related information, go here.

SG-News is not supported by advertisers. But we need funds to pay off certain people in the Government !

So keep sending your non-tax-deductible donations to: 

SG-News

P.O. Box 7486

Loveland, CO

80537-0486

USA

Cash, checks, jewelry, postage stamps, old or unusual coins or paper money, or anything with a high value-to-weight ratio is accepted.   A real gold coin (or equivalent) will get you an article in SG-News about someone you know !   It could be someone you love to hate, or someone you just want to ‘roast’ for fun.   It could even be yourself if you’re into that sort of thing.   You pick the person and give us some details and a picture if you have one.   We’ll write the story and publish it in SG-News !

Do it today for a better edition tomorrow !
(Or maybe next week –
we’re kinda lazy.)

Tell your friends and enemies about SG-News !

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Copyright 2006

Square Globe News

www.sg-news.com

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